never forget.

10 years ago today, our nation was rocked by a cruel, insensitive, evil group of people. I'll never forget that day. I was living at home, attending my second year of college. My Mom came in my room just after the first plane hit, woke me up, and told me what had happened. I was in complete disbelief and remember walking downstairs in a daze to sit in front of the television to see for myself. I vividly remember the horrific images I witnessed that morning and throughout the rest of the day. I sat for hours in complete shock, wiping away the tears, repeatedly telling myself it couldn't be real, yet the images played over and over again. At the time, I was a Kinesiology major at CSUF, still unsure about whether or not that was what I really wanted to do with my life. Seeing the selfless acts of the firefighters that day struck a major chord and ignited something within me that caused me do some major soul searching. I had already been working in the hospital and knew I wanted to do something that "helped" people. Less than a year later, I had enrolled in an EMT course which was the first step of many required to become one of those "helpers." I quickly fell in love with learning about the body and how it works, as well as how to take care of and treat the sick and injured. I'm digressing. Long story short, I had several jobs at multiple different hospitals over a six year period, hundreds of hours invested in school and studying, an entire year spent attending a fire academy, and a notice that I'd been placed on a two year wait list for nursing school. I had finally decided I wanted to be a nurse. Along that journey I met my hero. My soul mate. The man I knew would be my husband some day. And while I was on that wait list, Bryan asked me to be his wife and we quickly decided we wanted to have kids right away. After all, we had spent two years of our lives traveling and living life. The decision came to this...wait 2-4 years until I finish the nursing program to have kids, or have kids now and then attend nursing school? God had a hand in our decision as we found out I was pregnant just 3 months after we got married. Fast forward to the day Mackenzie was born...I took one look at her and knew I was never going to leave her side. My dream of attending nursing school quickly took a permanent back seat to my new dream of staying home and raising my baby. To this day I've never looked back. I've never wondered what if or I wish I would have...I know I'm living the dream. The dream I was always meant to live. I'm not just helping people, but I'm helping my own little people, my children. I can't imagine not being home with them to love on them, teach them and take care of them. I can only hope that I'm raising them to be amazing human beings. To walk with the Lord, do what's right, be respectful and kind, love deeply, be happy, and live every day as if it were their last. Who knew I'd be here 10 years ago? And then there's today...what a whirlwind of emotions I've been through. We attended our usual morning service at church. Today was dedicated to remembering 9-11 and all of the heroes that arose from that day and days since. It was an emotional but beautiful, tug-at-your-heart-strings but make you smile kind of service. I cried recalling the horrific scenes from that day, but smiled at the courageousness of our firefighters, police officers, and military who continue to fight for our freedom so that I can stay home to raise my children. Pastor Dave preached about how we have to stand up and fight for this nation to remain "One nation, under God..." and how Americans are doers and goers and that we're the only nation like that. I will say this...I am proud to be an American. Days like today are a great reminder of what an incredible country we live in. We are surrounded by selfless heroes. People from all walks, willing to lay their life on the line for a complete stranger. My husband is one of them. Scary? Yes. But all the more reason to be proud. Speaking of proud...I got to see Bryan all dressed up in his Class A uniform tonight. I can count the number of times I've seen him in it on two hands. There's just something about seeing him in his uniform, the way he carries himself, the instant respect he gets from complete strangers, the way my kids adore his "coolness." (sigh). We attended a special 9-11 memorial tonight at church. It was AMAZING. Everything about it. The service, the stories from family members who have lost loved ones as a result of that horrific day, the dedication of the new honor court out in front of the church, hearing Taps, seeing our congregation hold up candle sticks...I could go on and on. Incredible. Today was both happy and sad. Proud and defeating. Memorable and tearful. Today will always be remembered. Just like 9-11. I will never forget. And one more thing...God Bless America.